Lilly on the Spot: A Masked Ball

Lilly has been put on the spot again, this time by Vogue Magazine. She has 60 seconds to answer a question for their back-page ‘Fashion Focus‘ feature.

Vogue: “Lilly, Janice from the Shetland Islands has written in to ask what you would wear to a masked ball.”

Lilly: “A mask? No, just kidding, Janice from the Shetland Islands. That’s a fantastic question because, as a cross-dresser, I would absolutely love to go to a masked ball! It would be held at the Doge’s Palace in Venice. I would arrive by gondola at the Grand Canal waterfront in Piazza San Marco. My bodyguards would clear the way through the crowd and light my route with burning torches. They would all be members of the Secret Society of the Literati. You know, those senior judges, diplomats and clergy who spend their weekends wearing pointy white hoods and chanting in echoing underground chambers. 

I would wear a beautiful white satin ball gown with an enormous hooped skirt that would whisper like a spring breeze as it swept over the cobbles. I would pick a roundabout route, to take in as many steps as possible so I could keep lifting my hoops and showing off my bare feet and ankles to the scandalised crowd. 

I would have a jet black panther on a diamond encrusted leash. It would slink along in front of me and hiss at the paparazzi. If the budget didn’t run to an entourage of young ballerinas to throw rose petals on the ground before me, I would throw them myself. 

My papier mache mask would have been hand-painted by novice nuns, whispering and tittering at the thoughts it might hide. I would wear makeup under my mask, just so I could rush off to the cloakroom to refresh my mascara and lipstick, and gossip with all the lovely ladies hiding there. 

In the ballroom I would meet a gorgeous Italian naval officer and we would cavort and reel in each other’s arms, whirling along under a hundred crystal chandeliers until, of course, the Campanile clock struck twelve and I would leave her, calling after me from the terrace, and my Literati and I would run full-tilt for the gondolas to get back to the hotel before they lock the doors.”

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